I'm going to preface this by saying that I know I am not fat. I am perfectly healthy and I look fine. By body image and self esteem is not in question here (I know I rock.) However, with my birthday fast approaching, I have started to get frustrated that I have had the same body issues for the past (almost) 30 years. It doesn't matter how big or thin I am, my problem areas are always the same: in my mid section, and around my thighs. It also doesn't help that I am female, and we are genetically created to question such things.
In January I declared war on there problem areas and thus began my cardio regimine I have implemented until now. However, when I step on the scale (not that I have ever been a big numbers person), I am not losing weight at all, just gaining it. Yes, I am gaining muscle, which is great, however what I am not doing is burning fat.
Clearly, I am doing something wrong. I finally have the motivation to be active 5-6 days out of the week, and I am aware that my core and strength training need to be amped up big time. So that's something I can do. But the food seems to be an issue....I spoke with a health coach at work who confirmed that my body fat has not increased at all in the past year, but while I am burning my calories off from the day, I am not burning the fat, due to the timing in which I eat, and what food groups I eat when. She looked at my daily food and told me that my main 3 meals of the day should be about 300 calories, and then fill the rest with 300 calories in snacks (on the days I do not work out), for a total of 1200 calories. FYI, it's almost impossible to stay under 1200 calories even in a 90% organic diet, unless you are eating nothing substantial. My fitness pal says I should be at 1240 on the days I do not work out. When I work out of course, I gain extra calories for the day. Depending on the day, anywhere from 250-500 calories, and while this happens more often that not, I am still only "maintaining." She told me I need more protein, and more fiber, especially early in the day before my run. Less carbs, especially within 4 hours prior to the run.
However I am always hungry, and I'm always tired. I want to go to bed at 8pm. Granite, I work at 6:30 am but I draw the line at going to bed before 9pm, and I find that by the time I get home from work, run, make dinner and pack my lunch for the next day, I'm wiped out and not getting anything else done.
I started becoming obsessed with my caloric intake, so much so that when I was hungry between meals, I was afraid to add additional snacks in between because I didn't want to add the extra calories.
My sister, an amazing personal trainer (http://www.southbayfitcamp.com/), told me I needed to stop counting calories and start counting vegetables. Add more food fats to each meal and not worry about the calories, that I would see a better result. This sounds amazing.. but.. I'm torn! I have been liking the food journaling because it helps me stay accountable for what I am eating, how much I am burning, and my progress. But the numbers on the page are distracting! And when they go negative and the bad numbers are bold and in red, it does feel a little discouraging.
Why does it have to be so difficult?? Eating should not be rocket science. I think what is frustrating is that it's not like I am sitting at my desk eating cheetoes; I don't eat fast food, I rarely eat anything fried, I make myself homemade food for almost all of my meals. I eat a mostly organic pescetarian diet. I am doing it right, so why isn't my body getting the message??
I know I'll figure it out, but I hope I do it before I'm seventy.