2.5 weeks out!

The 13.1 mile course has been posted! This will be our Half Marathon in 2.5 weeks!

We are 2.5 weeks out from the race, and I have had more mood swings about this event than I can even count.  I have gone back and forth between excitement, motivation, frustration, sadness, pain, and determination.  

Each week in our training schedule, we have been adding another mile each week.  It's amazing, because 10 weeks ago I would NEVER have thought 3 miles or 5 miles was "easy." When compared to 8+, it is!  

• We ran 6 miles and I thought that 7 sounded so hard.
• We ran 7 miles and I thought 8 would be too hard.
• Then we ran 8 miles and I couldn't believe we were about to run 9!

The amazing part is that I think once you go over the hump (which we are thinking is about 6mi), adding another mile or so isn't hard.  Is it the runner's high they always talk about? I'm not sure. But what I do know is that I get tired at about the same end point of my run, whether it was 6 miles or 8.  I've convinced my mind and my lungs that I am capable, it's just convincing my sad, injured leg that it is invincible. I think that might be the hardest part about this: I can do this, but my leg just physically doesn't want to, and fights me every step of the way.

The muscle strain above my left ankle and along my inner calf has been sore since August. It seems to be going through waves.  It would have healed if I gave it more time off, but I was too stubborn and pushed through.  Then, last week, the tendon in the same foot all of a sudden started hurting.  Nothing happened, I didn't twist anything or step funny, it just got angry about 6 miles into the 8 mile journey! I feel that the two points of pain are related as they seem to run in a straight line.  If you are standing flat footed, and flex your right toe, the pain runs right along that tendon to the inner part of my foot.  

This Sunday we were slated to run 9 miles and I wasn't sure I could even put pressure on my right foot to run.  The part of your foot that takes the pressure and is used to "push off" the ground is kind of an essential part of running. So I loaded myself with ibuprofen, and taped it with my fancy Argyle Rock Tape.  My foot did surprisingly well! I felt it each step but had no problem running through it.  Everything I have read said that if you can run through the pain, it's ok to keep going.  Ok, great. But then my brilliant self was so focused on my foot that I completely forgot to tape my calf. I made it 7 miles before the throbbing in my calf was so strong I couldn't run another step.  We cut the run short at 7.35mi. I felt good about the run, but couldn't help but be pissed at myself for such a stupid mistake.

*I should also mention that Tempe Town Lake, our running location for the weekend, was hosting a Half Ironman.  This made us change our course to avoid being trampled by runners / bikers, so that was another reason for our lack of mileage. The change in course dropped a mile off of our route, which we were going to add to the end but I couldn't go on.

However, despite the fact that we ended short, I still felt invigorated that I ran through it.  The adrenaline in my veins told me that I could do this.  That the mind is an amazing thing and that adrenaline would have my back.  But it didn't take long for me to change my tune - within three hours later I was nearly crippled when everything had cooled down.  It didn't matter how much ice or biofreeze I applied, or how much ibuprofen I took - it has been throbbing since.  Hence the mood swings - I can't decide which I'm more excited for: entering the race in 2.5 weeks, or it all being over.  At this point, I'm tired of being unable to walk. I'm tired of hurting and being confined to flats. I'm tired of smelling like Biofreeze!  I'm tired of complaining. My only option is to stop, and it's not going to happen. I've come too far.  

So, I have come to terms with the fact that the race is going to hurt, and I am really going to hurt after. But then I can take some much needed time off of running.  I don't want to risk a chronic issue.  I only need to last 2.5 more weeks. Just 2.5 more weeks.

* * *

We've been talking a lot about "what happens after." I am about to complete 13.1 miles.. while it has been a grueling process, I am not the only one! I have read so many stories of runners who took several attempts to even get this far.  I am determined and not a quitter. But, this epic adventure cannot be my only story.  I know that the next race will be easier, and the one after that.  I will look back on this day and laugh about my silly beginner's story... right? ha!

2013 is going to be dedicated to smaller races.  Keep up the gym time and work on strength and muscle tone.  Small races throughout the year to work on improving pace.  And then another half. I am thinking that the PF Changs 1/2 Marathon in January 2014 might be a good goal. That's plenty of time to register early to avoid the expensive fees, avoids training throughout the summer, and gives me a year before I have to jump into another extensive training program. I think my body, mind, and family/friends will all appreciate the time off. :)

The gluten free / dairy experiment

One month ago, I started a new experiment with my diet.  I dropped all gluten/wheat from my diet, as well as all dairy. The only exception was eggs, but I kinda classify that as its own food group. It's actually been a lot easier than I thought, and an interesting learning experience.
A note about the eggs: Eggs are an AMAZING source of protein, and one I have become quite dependent on.  Additionally, they are so mellow on my stomach, I can literally eat and egg and then run 5 miles with no problems.  Not all foods are so forgiving. Since I have had no issues after eating them, I decided not to include them in this experiment.

I decided to give myself a couple more weeks on the gluten experiment, as I think I may have gotten a little wheat when we were in San Diego (I had vegan sausage and I didn't realize that most of them contain wheat). So, to be safe, I decided on 6 weeks just in case (since it can take a month to get it out of your system entirely). So, two more to go.

Over the past 5 years, I have dramatically changed my diet and gotten progressively pickier about where I shop, what I buy, and what I eat.  Just ask Jay, after I drag him to three grocery stores seeking "all natural" or "wild caught" products rather than buying what is on sale or available in the freezer section.  I feel empowered by knowing what is in my food, and I truly believe I feel better by fueling myself with better ingredients, even if they are more expensive.  I also believe that we vote every time we grocery shop, and I will vote to keep these items available and accessible to the public.

When I stopped eating meat, I stopped eating fish and dairy. Everything was removed from my diet initially because of cruelty issues, and then remained that way for health reasons.  I never craved meat, so I never felt the need to put it back in.  In fact, I felt better without it.  I did eventually start to crave the fish again, but that took 3 years to resurface (and is still on occasion).  The dairy was tough for me, so I brought it back in pretty quickly. I've had a love affair with dairy my entire life, and it always seemed to bring me back to the same result: my body doesn't like it.  My stomach especially doesn't like it, especially when I have a lot.  It gets bad, I drop it back, I feel better, I bring it back, I feel crappy. And repeat.  You see, I appear to be an "all or nothing" girl when it comes to dairy, cheese especially. I can't just eat it once a month. So apparently, it's time to say good bye, or I will just keep battling the stomach pain, occasional nausea, bloating, etc.

Over the past couple of years, I've slowly been working it out. Rice milk instead of half and half in my coffee. Almond milk instead of yogurt in my smoothies.  Sorbet or soy ice cream instead of ice cream.  Cheese was my downfall, as I was opposed to the idea of "soy cheese." And then I started this ingredient and gave it a shot: made enchiladas and it was delicious!

So why gluten/wheat?

I know I am not "allergic" to anything. I've had blood work done to confirm it.
I know I am not "lactose intolerant." I don't have the same symptom every single time.
What I believe is I have a food intolerance to dairy, and the wheat symptoms are incredibly similar.

Here are some of the gluten intolerance symptoms:

• weight gain
• gastrointestinal problems (bloating, gas, pain, constipation, etc)
• aching joints
• exhaustion
• head aches

Here are some of the wheat intolerance symptoms:

• gastrointestinal problems
• frequent headaches
• inflammation (joints and muscles), allergies
• chronic fatigue
• skin rash

Here are some of the dairy intolerance symptoms:

• gastrointestinal problems
• weight gain
• sinus pain and headache
• fatigue
• skin rash

Anyone who knows me knows I have always suffered headaches, I have really bad inflammation in my muscles (major knots from head to toe), I randomly get hives, I'm tired a lot. Gastrointestinal, check.  It all seems to add up.

Gluten intolerance is harder to pin point, unlike celiac disease. It can take days to feel the affects of it in your body.  That makes it really tough to diagnose.  It's also something that has consistently been in my diet since I was a child.  It may not be a huge problem, but I certainly eat too much of it. I started noticing all of the above symptoms, and it occurred to me that I hadn't had dairy in days. What I had eaten consistently was wheat.  The final straw was the week/weekend that we were moving and I felt nauseous after I ate any type of bread or dairy. My stomach was bloated, I felt very gassy, and I just felt terrible. And it was happening more often than not.

Since I started this experiment, I have been feeling so much better. I will be interested to see what happens when I start reintroducing food, but I am very undecided if I am going to reintroduce dairy at all. It might just be time to cut the cord. My family might kill me when it comes to the holidays this year, ha!

Not exactly sure how to classify myself now. I am a vegetarian that doesn't eat dairy or meat, but I eat eggs, and I have been craving fish a lot so I've been eating that pretty regularly (couple times a month) over the past year or two.

I guess I'm just Abby. :)

New plan of attack.

Yeah, buddy! That's an action shot. If it weren't for the soft sand, I would run with that back drop every day if I could! So pretty. :)

I've been getting really discouraged and angered easily by my frequent injuries, and I don't like how I feel when it happens.  This past week, a few things occurred to me:

• Fact: I feel better after I run. I actually feel better when I run.
• For the first time in my life, I was looking at runners on the side of the street (even in the middle of the afternoon when it is 110 degrees) and I actually miss running. I think this officially makes me a runner (I've always joked that I "run," that I'm not a "runner." Just like I'm "graceful." ha! )
• The only way for my leg to completely stop hurting, is to stop. And let me just tell you that this is not going to happen.
• The only way to not injure myself again is to strengthen my leg muscles. This again means not stopping, and more time in the gym working on strengthening exercises.

Suddenly I'm not as scared of running. It's a huge weight off my shoulders. 

Saturday, we ran 5 miles. This was the farthest I had run since we did our 10k in March. It felt amazing! I came home ecstatic and rejuvenated, and extremely proud.  Took us 55 minutes, but we ran the entire thing. (We got stopped quickly at 2 lights, but did not walk any). Living in the Central Corridor, we were able to run down Central along the light rail.  We rewarded ourselves with coffee and food and then took the light rail back up North, which is a 10 minute walk to my door. Running in a straight line was better for our psyche, too. There was no winding or looping; the end result was to run straight to the hot, delicious coffee (we are easily bribed and coerced by food and coffee).  

However, I still had a little trepidation about this run: How would I feel after?

Sore. Everywhere! My body wasn't sure how to handle the beating of running on the pavement again. But the good news was that my muscle strain hurt less than the muscle pain across my body. Progress! I'll take it.  I rewarded myself with a hot epson salt bath, was diligent about icing my leg and taking ibuprofen.  

My long run is the most important run of the week, so if this means I have to cross train during the week until my leg is ready, then so be it. But I am realizing that every bit counts, every bit of muscle strengthening helps, and getting my long runs in are the most essential parts of this training schedule.  

6 weeks in, 6 weeks to go!

Oh yeah, in case I'm missing, I'm probably at my second home:

Scheduling.

With my recent re-injury, I was starting to get a little overwhelmed by our training schedule.  The last training run I was able to do (non-elliptical) was 4 miles.  This weekend we were slated to run 7 miles.  That's a 3 mile jump, and my leg isn't exactly healed. I started finding that all I could think about was how far behind I was getting, how many miles I wasn't running, and how I was holding us back as a team.  This was getting really frustrating and it was starting to make me angry.

We tried water running on Wednesday morning - super low impact, a great cross-training option as an alternative to running, especially with an injury. At the time it didn't seem hard, but when we finished I could feel it everywhere. The only downside is that I had hoped to have done it in deep water so my leg had literally no ground impact.  At 4:30am, Lifetime only has the indoor pools open, and then only go 4 ft.  So, my leg was unhappy later that day, therefore Abby was unhappy later in the day. However, my anger fueled good weight lifting that afternoon, so at least that was successful. By last night, I had calmed down, relaxed a bit, and realized I needed to regroup. Again.

I've seen a lot of articles about modifying training schedules, but for some reason, this was a hard concept for me to grasp. I was determined to keep our training schedule set in stone.  However, it's been a busy couple of weeks, we've been tired and/or sick, so we were already starting to modify things.  Despite my hesitation to pull the training mileage back, yesterday at the gym, I realized I had no option but to adjust it.  In talking with Christi, it turned out to be a good solution for both of us.  The entire point of having this long training schedule is so we can modify it to meet our needs each week. It's not set in stone; there is no harm in making adjustments.  We luckily were about to do several weeks at 8 miles, so we decided to build up one mile per week for 5, 6, 7, and 8 miles, and then be back on track and back on schedule.

My main goal is to focus on running the long run. If my leg is hurting, then my short run and interval run of the week will be cross training with lots of resistance, and extra focus on strengthening the surrounding muscles.   I'm not going to be out of shape just because my leg isn't cooperating.  I will run this race and at least be in the best shape I can possibly be.

Fear of running?

The sunlight created a bit of a glare, but this is us coming down the giant sand hill at the end of the race.  Glad I've been training with resistance and hills. :)

This week I experienced something new: the fear of running.

We had been planning on this SandPit 5k for a couple of months. In my mind it was this fun thing we were going to do with a beautiful backdrop for a morning run.  However, when I strained the muscle above my ankle, I suddenly realized what running in the sand actually meant for me.

For the first time, I wasn't worried about the distance. 3.1 miles, no problem. I wasn't worried about the obstacles either. I suddenly became petrified at the idea of running on the sand.  What if I injured myself more? Was 2 weeks on the elliptical machine enough to give me the strength I needed? Would I be able to run the whole thing? Would I completely regret it the next day?

I was absolutely scared.  Butterflies in my stomach, trouble sleeping, mind racing. Seriously? It's a 5k. Snap out of it!  I realized that I had done everything I could possibly do to prepare, the only thing I could do was run!

Friday night, we got to bed later than I had planned on, midnight. We were sleeping on an air mattress on the floor, in a new place. It was warm, the train kept going by, and my mind was racing.  I woke up, semi-refreshed, and decided to put on my shoes and give it a test run.  I ran down the street and back. I knew it would hurt a little since I hadn't run in 2 weeks, but it still freaked me out. Should I compete?

I decided that I didn't drive all the way to California to be defeated without even trying. If I start the run, and I'm miserable, I would pull off. I would walk. But I wouldn't quit before putting my number on my back.

The race itself was hilarious.  My foot did pretty well. By the end, the wear and tear of my feet jerking around on the sand started to get to me, so I walked a little bit. Christi would not leave me behind.  In the end, we finished the race, 37 minutes.

The obstacles? The first half was on packed sand and through the water - running along the shore, running out into the waves (the water literally came to my chin), crawling through sand. The second half was all soft sand.  That was hard enough!! But then came tunnels, jumping walls, going through hoops, running up sand hills (tall ones), and rolling into a water pit. We finished laughing, because that was all we could do.

In the end, I'm happy I did it. I would have been sad to have not even tried.  We weren't fast, but we weren't that slow either. The finish times ranged from 19 minutes to 55. Right in the middle. And while my leg has been sore (really sore on Saturday and Sunday), it's already doing better.  I have realized this just may be something I am going to have to deal with until the Half is over. So I will keep stocking up on ice packs, ibuprofen, biofreeze, and arnica, and keep scheduling massages.

Forging ahead!

Week 5 of the training plan, and I am forging ahead!

Except, I've run into a small snag. After running 3 days a week for 2 months with no problem, the minute we amped up the training and added in our cross training and weight days, I injured myself.  Again!! After lots of research, I've given myself a self-diagnosis: muscle strain located on my inner left leg above my ankle, next to my shinbone.  It felt like a bruise to the touch, without there being a bruise.

I believe the problem was my shoes... my running shoes have been great for running, but that's what they are supposed to do. What they are not supposed to do is cross-train, and I believe that's where it happened. I think I tweaked my leg in Zumba the first week, then aggravated it over the next 2 weeks, and here I am.  A running coach at work explained that some people just have pickier bodies.  I would maybe have the same result if I tried to hike Camelback in Converse, or go for a really long walk in flip flops.  They aren't the proper shoes for that activity.  Running shoes are also heel supported, while cross training shoes are toe supported.  The only thing to truly cure a muscle strain is rest, and that wasn't really an option, with training needing to continue and the fact that I had to pack up and move to a new home.  Not exactly restful!

So. Ibuprofen, ice, biofreeze... and new cross training shoes:

http://www.ryka.com/en-US/Product/19065-5173967/Ryka/Blk_Vpr+Gry_Aqua_Lim/Womens+Synergy.aspx?partnerID=Email_TransShipConf

These are very comfortable, and I think they will work just fine. But, the damage was already done. I about lost my mind, because I couldn't run without my leg throbbing and I began to panic that I was out of the race again. Just when I needed to increase mileage, I was shoved a couple of steps back.  But then I composed myself, ordered my shoes, and declared myself elliptical bound for a couple weeks, which is what I've done.  I've kept up with the mileage, but hiked up the resistance.

My next fear was the 5k SandPit Race we had planned for this Saturday in San Diego: http://www.kozevents.com/Running_Events/Sand_Pit_5K.htm We had planned this awhile ago thinking that a fun race in much cooler weather would be just what we needed at this point in training! But as we got closer, and I was fighting an injury, I started to worry: Would my leg hold up? Would I injure myself more so that I am struggling even more with the next portion of training? What if I tweak my foot and I injure myself in another way? I never run in sand, so do I run in my shoes or run barefoot? I decided on shoes. I am used to running in them, and I am sticking with that, even if it means I need to buy new shoes afterwards.

So, onward! If my leg can't handle it, I will rest on the beach and cheer the runners on. But I am forging ahead and will not be defeated!!

Let the training begin!

Week One of training!

I didn't think I added that much more this week, especially since our scheduled runs weren't any longer than the previous week. But by Thursday night, I was positively exhausted!

Sunday night:
I tried really hard to be prepared for the week. I spent a couple hours in the kitchen juicing fruits and vegetables, making smoothies for the next two days' breakfasts, packing my lunch for Monday, and getting all my workout clothes washed. I was in bed by 9:00.  Of course, I couldn't sleep. I had the worst sleep ever and woke up pretty much every hour between 9 and 5. Not the best start...Sleep is the key to training!! As someone who has spent pretty much my entire adult life being sleep deprived (or maybe I've always been this way? I didn't like to sleep as a kid either), I am worthless at running without sleep! It is the very best nutrient you can give your body and I am reminded of the fact every time I don't get enough.

Monday:
We had a 3 mile run scheduled Monday evening. Christi was exhausted as well.  We pushed forward.  It was the hottest it had ever been in the evening when we ran: 111 degrees. There was absolutely no moving air, the air was thick and stale, and there was a storm over the mountains mocking us. I would have paid every dollar in my bank account for the storm to move over and the rain to rescue us. Or a sprinkler to go off? Throw me a bone, here! Nonetheless, we got almost the entire way without stopping: 2.9 miles.  I'll take it. We walked the rest.

Tuesday:
Zumba class at Lifetime! In case you didn't notice this, I am white. Very white. Not just my paleness, but my rhythm. I have an ethnic booty but boy did I get my ass kicked in this class! However, I had an absolute blast. I think I laughed the entire time.  And I was sweaty and exhausted when done, so it was a well earned 500 calories I burned off.  The entire point is to have fun, so this was achieved. I will go back next week.

Wednesday:
4:30 am run, 4 miles.  Usually, we have Tuesdays off, so we weren't expecting to be so tired on Wednesday.  However, we were.  I basically got home from class about 9 and then went to bed. Immediately got up and went running. Every part of my body felt heavy and I had a hard time with the first mile.  Even my shoulders felt heavy, which made it hard to swing my arms and keep up my pace.  We ended up walking part way in between, but honestly that's because it was also so hard to breathe in the heat.  I just wish the air would thin out already! Would be so much easier! There are lots of articles that talk about how beneficial it is to train in the heat, because then when race day arrives, you are that much faster! But they made a very valid point: "It will always be difficult, and that is normal." We are not failing. I've learned to realize that if I have to walk for a second, I am not a "failure" as a runner.
....
After work, we hit the gym to do a 30 minute core/weight workout.  This was the perfect amount of time, and despite our short workout, it was beneficial and I was sore afterwards! The hardest part for me is that I have very weak chest muscles post-surgery, so it's going to take some extra time to build up the muscle and get used to the feeling of using them again.  We tried out the Push/Pull workout I had posted about previously: http://abbyduval.blogspot.com/2012/06/push-pull-workout.html. Some of the exercises on the ball were so difficult! (and I'm sure we looked so ridiculous doing them in the middle of the gym..) I'm not sure that I like this one as a repeat workout.  Next week, we're going to try Cross-Fit: http://www.active.com/running/Articles/Improve-Running-Performance-With-Crossfit.htm. BOOM! Talk about an ass-kicking!

Thursday:
No rest for the weary! Sore and exhausted, we trudged over to the gym at lunch to do a treadmill speed workout.  20 minutes was the perfect amount of time, but we are realizing now we need to pick up the pace on the speed workouts.  No matter how fast 7.5 felt, we probably need to get up to 8.5 or so for our sprint minutes. (We are doing a slow pace 1 minute, followed by a fast pace 1 minute, and then alternating, gradually speeding up our fast minutes).

Friday:
REST! So thankful.  I was starting to feel terrible. Feel better now. :)

Saturday:
Tomorrow we are going to a Barbell Strength class at Lifetime. I'm nervous for this, but excited. It's supposed to be very hard. We needed a good strength day, and this seemed like the best way to do it.  8:15am. :)

Sunday:
More REST! Hooray!

I've noticed that this week I have been absolutely ravenous. I'm listening to it, and eating when necessary, but want to be cognizant of it so that I don't continually put on weight when I am trying to get into shape for the race.  I just read an article that brought up some great points about why runners actually gain weight when they train, and it's not just muscle mass.  A great point was the "I deserve this cookie" post run scenario (guilty), or the fact that we are eating more carbs, which leads to water retention.  Good to know! If you are interested in reading it, here's the link: http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-242-304--14055-0,00.html?cm_mmc=NL-Nutrition-_-1009824-_-08162012-_-Adding-Pounds-as-You-Add-Miles%3F

Special shout out to everyone who has been so supportive throughout this process.  I am fortunate to have an amazing boyfriend who tells me he is proud of me and urges me to go on when I am exhausted. I'm thankful to have an awesome training partner who also has a supportive husband as well. It is a team effort after all...

Love to you all!